I started journaling some of my experiences of being a Pastor's wife many years ago. As I look back at those entries, I see times of pain. And to be honest - it chills me just reading some of them. I wish I could go back to that young woman and hug her. I would tell her to be strong, to look for the good, and to live to please the Lord first and foremost. I would tell her to journal more and not just about the hard times. I didn't often journal about the good times in ministry. Why is that? I think I was looking for a way to cope with the hard things. And then hopefully move on and get freedom from the challenges. I wanted to be over my fear of rejection. I wanted to conquer my need to be liked. I was desperate to not care if someone didn't want to be my friend. I was so hopeful I would be indifferent if my husband was being criticized. Journaling was a way that I could express my pain. But I didn't know how to deal with it. I didn't know how to grow. I needed to mature and gain wisdom through experiences. But I also needed some tools to help me along the way. One question I often ask other Pastor's wives or women who are in ministry/married to men in ministry - "What is something you wish you could go back and tell yourself when you first started out?" I would tell myself to find a pastor, mentor, or friend (outside of the ministry I was serving in). Someone who could pour into me as I was pouring out to others. Someone who I could confide in and gain wisdom from. Someone who would CARE for me. Maybe that is why I am passionate about caring for you who are reading this. I wish I had that way back then. If you are a seasoned veteran in ministry - what would you go back and tell yourself? Please share with me as I would love to know. And if you don’t mind I will share it on this site to help others just starting out.
