There are few things I love more in life than doing ministry with my family. I love God. I love my husband and kids. I love many things. High on that list is ministry. Caring for people, outreach, serving in church, serving others, and reaching out to the lost and hurting makes my heart leap. It breathes life into me. It is what I want to do every day.
I know there are so many of us out there - pastors’ wives and ministry families that feel the same way. Recently, I had another pastors’ wife tell me that she was praying for me on a Sunday morning because Sundays are the hardest day of the week. To be honest - that kind of depressed me. Sundays can be hard. But I don’t want it to be thought of as the hardest day. I want to get back to that joy I felt of serving others and pouring myself out. You know - back before we became jaded and guarded. Before we became hurt and protective.
Sunday is a day of ministry. It is not the only day we do ministry - but it is a big day. Some Sundays are hard and others are just a pleasure. Recently I came across a quote by Rick Warren.
“Other people are going to find healing in your wounds. Your greatest life messages and your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts.”
That is an amazing thought. Yes ministry is hard. But I am challenged to change my thinking. Our hurts and wounds (whether they are from our church or other things) are making us more like the people God wants us to be. We all want to be used. We want to make a difference. That quote is so true that in our wounds we are able to provide effective ministry for others.
What if I took my hurts and looked at them differently? What if I let God work in them instead of retreating to the corner and putting my wall up? What if I let Him heal me knowing that someone else will benefit from them. What if I even rejoice in some of them because I know God is using them for a greater purpose. I might not see His redemption right away. But when I do - it will not only bring joy to me but it will be something that others are ministered through.
This Sunday I am going to go to church. I am going to love and serve. Yes I might get hurt. Yes I might feel like I am too wounded to pour out and care for others. But I am going to go with the expectation that God is going to use my pain in such a way that makes it worth it 10 times over. If I stay home or go but just sneak in and out - then I am wasting the hurts that God so wants to redeem. It’s not easy. At all. And it might take some of us a long time to get there. THAT IS OK! God is at work. He will patiently wait for you. I had a season of retreating. I needed it. You might need it too. But when you are ready to dip your toe back in just remember that you once had a love for ministry. You can have it again.